Tame the Tantrums

When a child struggles in school emotion problems are almost guaranteed.  It's pretty obvious why. Ask anyone to do something they felt incapable of doing. Then when they fail repeatedly ask them to do it again and again.  No fun right?

 

Children come up with any number of avoidance tactics. They don't want to feel the shame of poor performance. They don't want you to see them performing poorly. They don't anyone to know. So outbursts tantrums, procrastinating, or even being the class clown, these are avoidance tactics.

 

They are avoiding shame. And who can blame them?  Shame is the lowest emotion. At our biological roots, it equates with death. So, of course, anything is better than shame. Being grounded for a month, no more video games, whatever punishment that can be contrived, still doesn't outweigh shame. So nothing will work. Because deep seated in our psyche, shame feels like death.

 

However, as dismal as that sounds, there are answers.

 

Confidence is the great conqueror of shame. So all the confidence building tactics in the Learning Success System will, over time, eliminate shame. Confidence will eliminate the need for tantrums, avoidance, procrastination, etc. You will simply have a happier child.

 

Power Poses

 

Power poses are exercises and postures that cause us to feel emotionally stronger. Although this has been known in Kung Fu teachings and other mind body arts for centuries research is now showing the efficacy of these exercises. 

 

In addition, we also know that activating and stretching the large muscles (calves, hamstrings, thighs, glutes) used in a fight or flight response has a calming effect. This is because, when the child is experiencing anxiety they are actually experiencing a fight or flight response. That response tenses those muscles. Stretching them and exercising them a bit prior to homework has a relaxing, negative emotion releasing effect. That's why we have built exercises that have this response into the Learning Success System.

 

There are also other tactics to use along the way.